Copyright @ Bonnie Hamre 1997 - 1998 Bonnie Hamre Kaleidoscope
Kaleidoscope

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CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX


      Exhaustion claimed her just before dawn. She didn't hear her children get up and leave, nor was she aware of the strengthening sun. When the phone rang, just before noon, she jumped upright, woken out of a sound sleep. She almost knocked her bedside lamp over reaching for the phone. "Hello," she croaked.
      "Joey? Is that you, honey? What's wrong?"
      "Oh, Cole," she stopped to clear her throat. "I was so worried. Why didn't you call?"
      "I did call. I called and called. Your line was busy from last night until now. I was about ready to call the police."
      "But I wasn't using the phone," she demurred. "I told the kids to stay off the line so you could call."
      "Well, someone must have left the phone off the hook, then. I kept calling the operator who insisted nothing was wrong with the line. I'm surprised that they didn't take your line out of service."
      "Me, too, but no one would--oh, sweet heavens. Greg."
      "Yeah," Cole said flatly. "That kid is a menace."
      "I'll take care of it."
      There was a silence, then Cole said, "If you don't, honey, I will. That's a promise."
      "Let's not fight about this now, Cole. I've been up all night, waiting for you to call."
      "Aw, honey. I wish you were here."
      "Me too. I miss you."
      "The house is empty without you."
      "Funny, that's what I thought, too."
      "Yeah?" he asked, a pleased note entering his voice.
      "Yeah. What are you doing today."
      "Same as usual. Your mare is pregnant."
      "She is? How did that happen?"
      He laughed. "In the usual way, I guess. It wasn't planned. One of the studs must have gotten to her."
      "Are you mad?"
      "Nah. She'll give us a surprise come spring."
      "That'll be nice," she said, her voice soft and dreamy. "Do you think I could name the baby?"
      Cole laughed harder. "Honey, you can name every animal on the place if it'll make you happy."
      "I'd like that."
      "Red's moping around the place like he's lost his best friend. Or friends. He misses those little mutts."
      "Well, you give him an extra pat. Maybe a big bone."
      Cole chuckled, then his voice deepened. "Remember what I said. Let me know your flight, and I'll meet you in Butte. I can hardly wait."
      "Me, too. Oh, I hear Greg. I have to go, Cole. I have to speak to him right away."
      "Speaking isn't enough, honey."
      "I'll call you tonight, okay? After supper?"

* * *

      "I mean it, Greg. What you did was beyond rude. It was mean and nasty. I didn't raise you to be vicious. Now, give me your car keys. You're grounded for two weeks and you can forget your allowance during that time, too. You won't have any place to spend it."
      Joey's head was pounding. She and Greg had been arguing for better than an hour. At first, he'd denied knowing anything about the phone, then changed his story to say he'd left it off the hook this morning so she could sleep. At last he'd admitted that he'd cut class to get home and replace the receiver before she discovered what he'd done last night. Hurt to the quick by Greg's underhanded behavior, Joey could only thank Cole for his low key response.
      "I'll go to Gramps and Grandma's then. They love me."
      "You sound like a seven year old, Greggie. Act your age."
      "Stop calling me Greggie!"
      "Tell you what," she snapped. "You act like a seventeen year old, and I'll call you Greg.
      You want to be treated like a grown up, start acting like one! I've had it with your behavior. You know very well that you and Ellen mean the world to me, but even that has its limits."
     
      "What does that mean? Are you throwing me out?" he taunted. "Is that what you want me to do? So you can put all the blame on me for your refusal to grow up and face facts?"
      Greg's face fell. He'd never heard her talk like this to anyone, Joey knew, but it was time, past time, for some straight talking. "I'm sorry your father died. Sorrier than you'll ever know, Greg. He was my whole world, and you know that. He loved me, too, just as he loved you and Ellen."
      Greg's face lit up.
      Joey paused, remembering Tom and Greg together. They'd been so happy together. Best buds. She swallowed and forced herself to go on. "Do you honestly think he'd want us to sit around and pass up any chance of being happy for the rest of our lives?"
      "Uh..."
      "You think he'd want you to ignore the things you planned together? Or do you think he'd want you to get on with your life? What happened to your plans about college, about being the marine biologist he never got to be?"
      "Uh..." Now that she had his attention, Joey gave him no mercy. "Do you think your Dad would be pleased to see you acting self-centered and nasty?"
      "Uh, no."
      "So get with it, Greg. Get a grip on yourself and figure out what's important to you. If making me miserable, and ruining any chance of my being happy is more important to you than making something of yourself, just go right on doing what you've been doing. After you've done that, you can start on Ellen. She has her life ahead of her, too. Maybe you can mess that up while you're at it.
      "Then you can go on to your grandparents. They won't be as easy though. They've already been through the wringer and they know they have a lot to be thankful for. But you can give it your best shot, Greg." Pausing for breath, she continued more slowly. "You have a choice, here. Why don't you shape up? Make your father and me proud?"
      "You're trying to lay a guilt trip on me!" "If that's what it takes to get through to you, I'll use any means I have. Being fair and understanding and loving didn't work. Let's see if a good shaking up will do the trick."
      "That's not fair!" Greg burst out.
      "So who said life was fair? Were you fair to me or to Cole? What makes you think you get special treatment?"
      "My Dad died..." "My husband and my best friend in the whole wide world died, too!"
      Greg's eyes widened. His throat worked, and then he let out a howl of pure agony. He cried then, in great heaving sobs that shook him and Joey both. She wrapped her arms around him and held on while he shuddered with the force of his grief.
      At first he tried to push her away, but Joey persisted, holding him tight against her. Murmuring words of comfort, she held him, close to tears herself, until slowly his sobs abated. Snuffling, he wiped his eyes like a child. His breathing evened out, but he didn't move from her embrace. She held him, rocking back and forth as she had when he was a child. She murmured the soft, loving words that she'd used for years.
      "I love you so much, Greg," she added, her voice tender. "It hurts to see you this way. You're hurting, too. I know it. I feel it, and I wish I could make the pain go away, but that's going to take time. In the meantime, you can't resign from the world. You have to work at it, too."
      He mumbled something. She didn't know whether it was protest or agreement, but she wiped his tears away and continued. "I can't make your Dad come back, Greg. I've had to accept that he's gone from our lives, but he'll always live in our hearts."
      "But Cole..." "Let me tell you something, Greg. I wasn't sure we could make our marriage work, or even if we should stay married, not at first."
      He lifted his head and looked at her through red-rimmed eyes.
      "But it's different now. I want to be married to Cole. I want to make a new life for myself. And I want you to be a part of that."
      His mouth quivered. "But Dad?"
     
      "Will always be your father. I will always love your Dad," she stressed. "But I can love Cole, too." "You won't forget Dad?"
      "Never. He's in my heart. Just like he's in yours, but we have to keep on living. Are you planning to be unhappy the rest of your life?"
      "I'm sorry, Mom." Greg lowered his eyes. "I guess I was acting pretty bad, huh?"
      "You were." She lifted his chin to look directly at him. "Are you going to keep on like that?"
      "I'll try not to." He took a deep breath and cleared his throat. "I'm sorry I made things rough for you and Cole, Mom. I guess I was just surprised that you'd want somebody else after Dad. I mean, that you'd want to be with another man...I mean..."
      "I think I understand what you mean, Greg. I know it's hard for you. You see my marrying Cole as rejecting your father. I don't know how to convince you that it's not like that at all. I guess you'll have to take my word for it."
      "I'll try." He stumbled over the words. "But, Mom, please don't make me go back to Montana. If you want to, that's fine for you, and I won't give you a hard time about it, but I don't belong there."
      "I want you with me, Greggie-—I mean Greg. You're my son."
      "Yeah, but I'm almost eighteen, Mom. I mean, you want me to grow up and everything, so give me a chance, huh?"
      They sat quietly, each coming to grips with their changing relationship. Joey brushed his hair off his forehead. "Look, I can't promise anything yet. But if your grandparents agree to temporary custody, until you're eighteen, I may consider letting you stay here to finish senior year."
      "Yeah?" Hope shone on Greg's face. His eyes clearing, he looked at her with rising expectation. "You mean it?"
      "I said may, Greg," she reminded him. "It depends on a number of things. Above all, I've got to feel that I can trust you. You'll have to meet some pretty tough conditions."
      "Name them," he said confidently.
      "Not so fast. I need to talk with your grandparents first."
      "When, Mom?"
      "When I'm ready. I have to check into some things."
      "Like what?"
      "Like what we have to do for temporary guardianship, to make it legal. Other things."
      "Today?"
      "Slow down, Greg. Let me take my time with this, to make sure we're doing the right thing." His face fell. "I guess."
      "I can tell you this right now, though. There will be absolutely no more cutting classes. You understand?"
      "Yeah, yeah."
      "I've heard that before, but this time it's serious. You can show me your good intentions by getting your butt back to school. And remember, you're grounded. That means school and home, got it?"
      Glumly, he nodded.
      "If you're going to be a marine biologist, you've got to get your grades up to get into college."
      He exhaled noisily. "Yeah."
      After he left, slamming the screen door behind him, she made herself a cup of tea and sat at the kitchen table to drink it. Her mind whirled with the things she had to do, the decisions she had to make. When she had her wits about her again, she showered, dressed in cheerful colors and made the first of many phone calls.
      By the time Ellen got home from work, Joey was mentally exhausted. Excusing herself, she slipped on her athletic shoes and went for a walk on the beach. With the sun setting low on the horizon, bright crimson rays bouncing off the dark blue sea, Joey thought about Cole's reaction to colors.
      How surprising to meet a man who recognized the importance of colors in his life. They were so much a part of hers that she didn't know how she could live without them as he said he had. If she had her way, neither one would have to do without them ever again. Calmer on her return to the house, she had dinner with her children, putting off Greg's demands for answers and went into her room to place her call to Cole.
      Betty answered the phone. Joey suppressed a groan. Not now, she didn't have the strength to face Betty's hostility tonight. "Hi, this is Joey. May I speak to Cole, please?"
      "Ah, sure, Joey. I'll get him in a moment, but could I speak to you first?"
      Joey gritted her teeth together. "What is it, Betty?"
      "I owe you an apology," the other woman said hesitantly.
      "What?"
      "An apology," Betty repeated. "Cole told me it was your idea to let me run the business end of things while Sam's laid up."
      "Uh, yes. Is that a problem?"
      "Oh, no! I love doing it. Cole and I talked things over with Sam, and I'm going to keep on doing it, even after Sam's better. I have you to thank for it."
      Joey couldn't believe the difference in Betty. Her voice was joyful and buoyant. "Well, good," she said, her own voice warming in response. "I'm glad it worked out, then." "I'll call Cole, now."
      When Cole came on the line, Joey was still amazed. "Well, this has certainly been some day." She told Cole everything that had happened.
      "I don't know what to say. Are you sure we're talking about the same kids?"
      Joey suppressed a happy giggle. "I don't know what you said to Betty, but thank you. She sounds like a different person."
      "She's acting like one, too. We owe it to you, honey. Now that I look back on it, I suppose I knew that something wasn't right with Betty, but I never figured it was because she needed something different to do. After all, she had her hands full, looking after Sam and me and the house. Who woulda thought she'd want something more to do.
      "You had the right idea there, all right. Sam's pretty pleased about it, too. He and I both get out of a job we don't like and Betty's happy to do it. She's better at it, too. We're all better off."
      She'd never heard him say so much at once. "I'm glad it worked out then."
      "Yup."
      "Cole? Do you think I did the right thing with Greg?"
      "You know, I got to thinking about Sam. How unhappy he'd be if I'd uprooted him at that age. It made me realize that I was wrong to insist Greg stay here. If you can work something out for him that will satisfy everybody, I'm all for it."
      Joey's heart went out to him. "Thank you, Cole."
      They talked for a few more minutes, soft words which betrayed the growing feelings between them, though neither spoke of the deeper emotions Cole refused to acknowledge. Joey sighed. Would he ever love her?
      Wasn't there something she could do about it?

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Ready for the last chapter? violet Chapter Twenty-Seven -- posted August 1, 1998

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Last updated: August 1, 1998